bitswap(messagequeue): Expose DONT_HAVE timeout knobs

[Wondertan]

Context

Don't have timeout is an important security feature that prevents malicious peers from never responding with DONT_HAVE. If a peer we sent WANT_BLOCK never responds, a Bitswap session stalls and does not re-request other peers. This mechanism has a bunch of configuration parameters .

Request

Expose those parameters for protocol-specific fine tuning. The defaults timeout too quickly, sometimes causing:

• Duplclicate requests
  • A asked B for Cid -> A timed out waiting for Cid and asked C -> B kept processing requests, and with C now -> A received two responses.
• Peers eviction from session. Once 64 DONT_HAVE received, the peer is dropped, even tho the peer is healthy.

[Wondertan]

(I will propose a PR)