HPCC-31116 Fix 1 min delay introduced waiting for some CQ's

[jakesmith]

The changes introduced by HPCC-30288 also caused Thor to stall for 1 minute per CQ that had not been started.

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Testing:

[github-actions]

Jira Issue: https://hpccsystems.atlassian.net//browse/HPCC-31116

Jirabot Action Result:
Workflow Transition: Merge Pending
Updated PR

[ghalliday]

@jakesmith one question about whether any of these changes will hit a race condition between aborting and starting a child query/graph?

[ghalliday]

Is there any potential problem with a child query that is just about to start?

[jakesmith]

you're right, if this is a container containing child graphs, then it should be allowed to recurse.
This change (and the similar on in CSlaveGraph::abort weres incidental to the actual fix (in CSlaveGraph::done), I'll remove these changes.

[jakesmith]

@ghalliday - see 2nd commit

[jakesmith]

@ghalliday - squashed