Change xdebug trigger method to improve performance

[danstaver]

Description
Today, you have to manually enable/disable xdebug, which is taking time, and sometime the user can forget to enable it and wonders why the breakpoint didnt trigger, or, you have the option to always have it enabled, which is negatively affecting performance in local.

It would be great if we could have the same logic in place as what today adobe commerce cloud has, where, even in production i can trigger xdebug, without it affecting regular users
https://experienceleague.adobe.com/en/docs/commerce-cloud-service/user-guide/develop/test/debug#debug-for-pro-staging-and-production

What we could try to do, implement something similar to comment #2 from
magento/magento-cloud-docker#112 (comment)

Steps To Reproduce

1. N/A

Expected Result

• xdebug triggers only when XDEBUG_SESSION cookie present in request. This request is being sent to a separate process with loaded and configured xdebug extension
• if XDEBUG_SESSION cookie not present, request is sent to a process which does not have xdebug loaded at all

Actual Result
xdebug is either enabled or disabled (but, even if enabled or disabled, the extension is still loaded)